The Voice Inside Your Head Isn’t Always Right — But It’s Always Loud

 


— A personal reflection on self-talk, inspired by Chapter 3 of “Shanti Sutra”
By Shailesh Dubey

Imagine you’re sitting in a theatre — not watching a movie, but your own thoughts. The lights are dimmed, the world is silent, and all you can hear is a voice echoing in your mind.

Now ask yourself: Is that voice kind… or cruel?

Our mind is a storyteller — and we’re its only audience.

From the moment we wake up, there’s a voice that begins to speak.

“You’re late again.”
“You could have done better.”
“Why did you say that?”
“Don’t get your hopes up.”

We don’t question it. We just follow its script.

In Chapter 3 of my book “Shanti Sutra,” I talk about this inner dialogue — the constant self-talk that silently shapes how we feel, behave, and see ourselves.

It’s like we’re living in a house where the mirrors lie.
They show us flaws, but hide our strengths.

Two Coins, Two Voices

I like to think of self-talk as a coin. One side is the critic, the other is the companion.

The critic says:
“You failed.”
“You’re not enough.”
“Everyone else is doing better than you.”

The companion says:
“You tried.”
“You’ve grown.”
“It’s okay to rest.”

Which voice do you hear more often?

Most of us have spent so long listening to the critic that we’ve forgotten we can flip the coin.

Where does that inner critic come from?

That voice didn’t appear overnight.
It was shaped over years — by childhood expectations, comparisons, punishments, betrayals, and social messages.

Maybe someone once told you, “You’re not good at this.”
And your mind turned it into a belief: “I’ll never be good enough.”

Over time, those passing words become your internal programming.

You no longer need people to pull you down.
Your own mind does it for them.

How do we change that voice?

The answer isn’t in silencing the voice.
It’s in understanding it.

When your mind says, “You’re not capable,”
pause and ask:

“Whose voice is this really?”
“Is this the truth, or a memory disguised as logic?”

This awareness is like turning on a light in a room you thought was haunted — you realize the monsters were shadows.

Try this small practice today:

At night, before sleeping, write down 3 things you did right today.
Not perfect. Just right.

  • You helped someone.

  • You completed something you had postponed.

  • You chose rest when you needed it.

This simple habit slowly builds a new voice — the voice of your inner friend.

The metaphor of the river

In Shanti Sutra, I used the metaphor of a river to explain inner dialogue:

Your thoughts are like the flow of a river — continuous, deep, and often shaped by the rocks it has touched.

But you are not the water.
You are the sky above — capable of observing the flow, guiding it, and choosing where to stand still.

When we stop identifying with every thought…
We begin to lead our mind, instead of being led by it.

 Want to dive deeper?

This blog draws from Chapter 3 of “Shanti Sutra”, where I explore how our internal conversations impact every area of our life — self-esteem, decisions, healing, and even relationships.

The book is not a lecture. It’s a mirror.
And sometimes, all we need is to look gently into ourselves.

👉 You can explore the book here:
https://amzn.in/d/5zJHAig


“The way you speak to yourself becomes the way you live with yourself.”
So speak softly.
You’re listening.

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